“Many problems arise because of broken relationships where no one said a proper goodbye. It could be a former partner, family member, friend or colleague that has passed away, or that you have parted ways with over a disagreement. You might not be fully aware of how much former relationships fill your mind.
It is hard to say goodbye to a person that has made you feel loved and that you have loved in return. It can be even harder to part with a relation where there were many ambivalent emotions involved. The same way you can find it hard to leave a meal before you are completely full, it can prove particularly difficult to say goodbye to a relationship, where you were never completely satisfied. Many people suffer from low self-esteem for years following a divorce or break up that they are not completely over.
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Chris Calland and Nicky Hutchinson, authors of Minnie and Max are OK!, discuss the rising issue of body confidence in children and ways we can help them to see themselves more positively and celebrate their identities.
Tracy Barker, author of A Sad and Sorry State of Disorder, is an expert by experience on how to live with and manage borderline personality disorder (BPD), now a happily married home maker committed to raising awareness of BPD, she has written an emotional and honest piece on how it feels to have BPD, the struggles and how to deal with it; one step at a time.
One step, then take a break –
a few days, to recover.
One step, then rest
before embarking on another.
Michael Panckridge, co-author of Be Bully Free, takes a look at the different forms that bullying can take and suggests strategies that victims of bullying can adopt to overcome the problem.
Bullying is about power and the perceived need to gain dominance over another person either physically, intellectually, socially or emotionally. Research into the effect of bullying behaviour indicates that not only does it produce negative short-term psychological problems, but can also affect a person well into their adult life and even lay the foundations for significant and ongoing emotional health problems. Sometimes the bullying is overt and immediate. However, in many cases, the bullying is low-key and ‘hidden’, and the recipient may not be aware of it immediately. Initially the recipient may think it is their own behaviour that is causing the bullying – that there is something wrong with them or what they do. When this happens, the recipient of the bullying tends to avoid being with other people and they use strategies to escape. This may include avoiding school, which can signal the start of school refusal. Continue reading →
Jonathan Charlesworth, author of That’s So Gay!, discusses the concerted effort by the government and anti-bullying organisations to tackle homophobia in schools but admits that there is progress still to be made. Observing that it is very important just to be yourself in life, he asserts that, in order to be so, restraints such as homophobia need to be removed.
Are you a secondary school teacher or college tutor keen to help a student who’s questioning their sexual orientation and would welcome some guidance? Perhaps you’re a primary school teacher eager to challenge homophobic name-calling or bullying?
In the modern day, civil partnerships are legally recognised throughout the United Kingdom and same-sex marriages are similarly conducted everywhere except North Ireland. It’s an offence to incite or commit a homophobic or transphobic crime. Meanwhile, all our schools and colleges are bound by a Duty of Care to ensure their pupils or students are safeguarded against homophobic, biphobic or transphobic (HBT) bullying. Add to this the finding from a YouGov survey that 49% of young people aged between 18 and 24 define themselves as something other than heterosexual (1) and you would think we wouldn’t have any problem with homophobic bullying in or out of our schools and colleges.
Yet lesbian, gay or bisexual young people including those questioning their sexuality remain vulnerable to harassment and far too many are still experiencing bullying in our schools. Continue reading →
Research shows that for many schools it is hard to keep up with the high speed train that is a student’s online life. New apps and high risk behaviours emerge at the same time that new Ofsted inspection requirements are outlined. Only 45% of secondary pupils strongly agree that their teachers know enough about online safety, whilst Ofsted says that training for teachers is inconsistent. So how do you address the fastest evolving aspect of a young person’s education today?Continue reading →
Poetry can prove a great way into difficult conversations in therapeutic, classroom or family settings. In this chapter from Using Poetry to Promote Talking and Healing, author Pooky Knightsmith offers a series of poems to help get people talking about issues surrounding bullying and abuse this Anti Bullying Week.
Using Poetry to Promote Talking and Healing includes a collection of over 100 poems written by the author with accompanying activities, as well as a 50 prompts to encourage clients to write their own poems. A complete resource for anyone considering using poetry to explore difficult issues, and a creative way of exploring important mental health issues in PSHE lessons, this book will be of interest to youth, school and adult counsellors, therapists, psychologists, pastoral care teams, PSHE co-ordinators and life coaches, as well as parents.
It’s Anti Bullying Week, and to mark the occasion we thought we’d share this extract from Naomi Richards and Julia Hague’s new book Being Me (and Loving It) which contains 29 easy-to-read stories to help build self-esteem, confidence, positive body image and resilience in children aged 5-11.
In this story, Ginny becomes upset when the older girls in the playground start calling her names. Turning to her mother for advice, she learns that it is best only to listen to the people who you care about and to ignore those who you don’t. The story is accompanied by notes for the educator to support discussions and reinforce the messages being taught.
Dr. Nicola Davies, co-author of Eating Disorder Recovery Handbook, discusses the benefits of a holistic approach to recovery and what questions you need to answer before beginning your journey.
Many people suffer from eating disorders and often they do so in secret. Living with an eating disorder like anorexia, bulimia, or binge eating disorder can be an extremely isolating experience, which can deplete your self-esteem and confidence, distort your concept of health and body image, and make you forget what is truly important in life.
Recognising that you have a problem with an eating disorder is an important first step, followed closely by the acknowledgement that you need help and you need to open up about the problem to someone you trust. In recovering from an eating disorder, you will need to go through several stages, which can take a lot of time and energy. Rates of recovery will be different for everyone and there may be times you will return to unhealthy eating and dieting behaviours. It’s easy to perceive this as a sign of failure and lose confidence in moving forward, but it’s important to keep focused on positive change.
So, what does it take to achieve recovery from an eating disorder? Although eating disorders are linked with unhealthy eating, dieting and exercise practices, overcoming them takes a whole lot more than changing what you eat and normalising your weight. Eating disorders often spring from a very deep emotional pain and are associated with other conditions such as depression, personality disorders, and obsessive behaviours. This means that long lasting recovery from an eating disorder involves the strict re-alignment of your entire life – dealing with the past, living in the present, and navigating the future.