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Telling Tales About Dementia

Telling Tales About Dementia

Experiences of Caring

Edited by Lucy Whitman
Foreword by Joanna Trollope

Paperback: £14.99 / $24.95

2009, 234mm x 156mm / 9.25in x 6in, 224pp
ISBN: 978-1-84310-941-9, BIC 2: JKSM MBP VF

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'... these 208 pages (with additional glossary, lists of recommended reading and helpful organisations), does have genuinely uplifting moments, sprinkled among the diverse and informative case studies: this is a genuinely moving document, and the wealth of experience drawn on merits careful consideration... Given present estimates that there are 700,000 individuals in the UK experiencing some form of dementing illness, books such as this serve a valuable purpose.'

- Working with Older People, Stephen Weeks, Book Reviews Editor

'Despite the increasing number of books on caring for a person with dementia, few capture the perspective of the carer to the degree managed by Lucy Whitman in her edited book Telling Tales about Dementia... Together the real-life stories provide a range of insights into: the grief and stress of losing a loved one to dementia ('Living with loss'); managing the challenges of dealing with the care system ('Dispatches from the battlefield'); and maintaining communication with a relative with advanced dementia and/or keeping them company at the end of life ('Keeping in touch, letting go'). These are supplemented by a very useful contextualising introduction by the editor, and some recommended reading and a list of helpful organisations at the end. These moving and personal stories, which are a mixture of the voices of the carers themselves and a transcription of a discussion with the editor, evidence the complexity, pain and variety of both "having dementia" and dementia caring experiences. The fact that some of the tales are accompanied by photographs, that one contribution is in the form of a poem and that the tales are from carers from a variety of backgrounds strengthens the book's capacity to provide a genuine cornucopia of human experience "warts and all"... One the most powerful dimensions of the book is its multiple perspectives and inspiring portrays of astonishing levels of stoicism, devotion, resilience and love displayed by "ordinary" people for their relatives and friends with a chronic, disabling and distressing condition...The book unashamedly adopts the subjective experience of dementia caring as its standpoint and offers a rich source of raw evidence about what it is like to care for someone you love with dementia in the real world, right now.'

- Quality in Ageing and Older Adults

'I know of no book at all comparable to this recent Jessica Kingsley publication... Telling Tales about Dementia will be a great encouragement to other carers. They will feel in the company of those who do understand the agony and the poignancy from the inside. It also has so much to contribute to the understanding and training of professional carers. It is devoutly to be hoped that, as the government's national dementia strategy is implemented, it will address some of the vital concerns so vividly depicted in this book.'

- Christian Council on Ageing

'As a practitioner in dementia support, I found this book inspiring. With dementia rising up the healthcare agenda and the government's dementia strategy acknowledging the scale of future needs, it is important to listen to the voice of people living with dementia in service planning.'

- Nursing Standard

'... this is a genuinely moving document, and the wealth of experience drawn on merits careful consideration. Books like this will go some way to redressing that balance.'

- Working with Older People

'Every one of these stories is a jewel-house of observation, dedication and feeling. Every one can and should be used to teach us as individuals and in reflective groups - be we informal (family) carers or professionals... This is a wonderful book which we must be thankful for and make good use of.'

- For Dementia Plus

'Telling Tales About Dementia: Experiences of Caring is a book of stories about real relationships touched by dementia...This compilation is highly readable... It is helpful for people with a relative with dementia, enabling them to see they are not alone. My hope is, however, that it will also be read by professionals who come into contact with families; it would be a fitting reward for their courage and honesty, if the carers who contributed were able to see it positively influencing the experiences of other carers.'

- Julia Burton-Jones, freelance care home consultant, R&RA

'There is much to be learned from these thirty moving and beautifully written stories of carers looking after people they love and who have dementia. The accounts are all very different and each has something special to tell us about the centrality of relationships and life histories in understanding and caring for anyone.'

- Standards for Practice

'These personal accounts by family carers, harrowing, distressing, but also inspiring and uplifting, will have you weeping one moment and laughing the next, as they describe struggling to manage situations that range from horrific to comical. How do you cope alone with your loved one's slow loss of rational thought and behaviour? You cannot - and you need not. The single most valuable achievement of this book is to tell carers they are not alone. The more of us there are, the stronger we become, and the better we can fight for our loved ones in the face of this cruel disease.'

- John Suchet, broadcaster, who is caring for his wife Bonnie, who has dementia.

'These accounts are a tribute to the abiding insistence on according dignity to every one of us until our last breath. Reading these stories will make us all, in the words of one of the contributors, "determined to make a difference".'

- Joanna Trollope, OBE, Patron 'For Dementia'

'This anthology of carers' stories possesses the gift to take readers on a rollercoaster of emotion. The honest accounts of families caring for partners and parents living with dementia are inspiring, uplifting and yet at times heart-wrenchingly tragic. It is a captivating and essential read for all professionals trying to understand and help families caring for a loved one living with dementia. Echoes of indifference in the face of family devotion and upset stand in distressingly sharp contrast. I was left in no doubt that all health and social care practitioners, including those working in care homes who read these tales will be unable to stop themselves looking at what they do and asking can we not do better?'

- Dr Graham Stokes, Consultant Clinical Psychologist

'These powerful stories should be read by everyone involved in health and social care, from commissioners designing services to those giving direct care and support. I hope they will also be read by those who have had no previous contact with dementia, to help combat the stigma it still carries through lack of public awareness... The accounts are moving, engrossing, sprinkled with quirky humour, and truthful. There is both warm praise and angry criticism of services. I hope the book will play its part alongside the National Dementia Strategy to help eradicate some of the glaring bad practice it highlights... Vivid personalities shine through, reminding us that every person with dementia, every carer and every caring relationship, is different and individual, therefore services need to be sensitive, personal and flexible.'

- Dementia Care

'The stories of these carers - sisters, brothers, husbands, wives, lovers and friends - are not confined to the painful subject of dementia: the book is also about anger, loss, love and loyalty. It's both powerful and moving.'

- Diana Melly, writer and widow of jazz legend George Melly, who had dementia in his final years

'This book will speak to other carers who will empathise with or learn from different chapters. However, the narratives across the chapters also provide strong lessons and experiences that both increase understanding and highlight key issues for a much wider audience - particularly for formal carers, service developers, policy makers, commissioners and anyone with an interest in improving the experience of living with dementia for both the person and their close friends and family. Central to this is the importance of relationships in all their complexity and form: the book illustrates this fundamental importance beautifully.'

- The Journal of Ageing and Society, Heather Wilkinson, Co-Director of the Centre for Research on Families and Relationships and Research Director for the School of Health in Social Science at the University of Edinburgh

'Telling Tales About Dementia: Experiences of Caring offers experiences from some thirty care givers from different backgrounds and circumstances who describe their experiences caring for a partner, parent or friend with dementia. Any affected by dementia in either a professional or personal realm will find this collection eye-opening, engaging, and educational.'

- The Midwest Book Review